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I never expected to bury my child. It is the most unnatural posture on earth\u2014to stand while they lower your boy beneath it. Richard was thirty\u2011eight. I was sixty\u2011two. April rain threaded through the oaks at Green\u2011Wood Cemetery and slicked the marble angels until they looked like they were weeping with us. Sound came thin and far away: shovel on wet soil, a zipper of thunder somewhere over the harbor, the soft human noises people make when they don\u2019t know what to do with their hands. Grief walled me off. Faces blurred at the edges until only the polished mahogany, the raw mouth of earth, and my own name spoken in softened tones remained.<\/p>\n
Across the grave stood my daughter\u2011in\u2011law. Amanda\u2014precision hair, liner that wouldn\u2019t dare smudge, posture like a trademark. Married three years and somehow the gravitational center. Her black Chanel looked like a dress made for sponsorship dinners, not for the edge of a grave. She accepted condolences with a professional tilt of the head. When our eyes met, she arranged a sympathetic smile that never touched anything living.<\/p>\n
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