By morning, all three of my ungrateful children would discover that their financial safety net, the one woven from four decades of my hard work and sacrifice, had vanished faster than their respect for me.

Let me back up and tell you how I, Eleanor Walsh, a 62-year-old retired high school English teacher from Ohio, ended up declaring war on my own children over mashed potatoes and stuffing.

The whole mess started when I asked Margaret to pay back the $15,000 I’d loaned her eight months ago for her kitchen renovation. I hadn’t demanded it; I had asked politely, like you’d ask someone to pass the salt. We were between the main course and dessert, a natural lull in the conversation.