My bladder, compressed by the seven-pound baby girl waiting to make her entrance, screamed for relief. I scanned the area. Every bench was full, but I spotted a high-backed, cushioned wicker chair in the shade of a massive oak tree. It was empty.

I waddled over, practically collapsing into the plush cushion. For a moment, I closed my eyes, letting the shade cool the sweat on my forehead.

“What do you think you’re doing?”